As I was praying today, deep thought and all. My eyes all of a sudden was fixated on the candle that was burning. At that moment, just realized how much the candle in my eyes and belief represented our life. To me like a candle, we were first molded by Him, we are all innocent and as white and fragile as can be. Once the candle is ready, it is then lit up and it almost as if like our life, once we are lit up by something, we have hope and dreams that we always think of. The smoke represented, the very essence of our being, we lose our childlikeness the way God intended us be.  Once the smoke goes up, its gone forever, just like when we hurt someone, once done, it can never be repaired, innocence lost
.  As the fire and smoke keep melting away, so does our body, and mind, but the spirit remains the same. the more the wax melts, the more the candle strengthens and shortens, like life, each time we grow more, we are much more defined in our hearts, mind and body. Our hearts learns each time we get our heart broken, with our minds, we grow more wiser as we learn more about life, and our body becomes stronger as time would let us, yet like the candle, our life is limited. Fire burns away the candle, like the world around us, every minute, every moment we lose our life because its just the way we were meant to be; temporary. From start to finish, the fire burns away, until the last moment, last smoke that goes up and just exhales, like life the moment of our death can mark the end of the chapter in our lives, and now what does it all mean? Like a candle, our life was meant for something, now its up for each and every person what they think they are, if you ask me, my light is for God….

      Yesterday was just tough, never imagined myself having that kind of day. First of was traffic, yes it was clogged so in spite of that, I still kept my cool. Then of the office I go, once I get there, we have a meeting and bad news is delivered, at first I was upset because I totally blamed myself for the mistakes, so the whole day I was just quiet and just doing my usual thing, instead of my usual self which is lighting up everyone and just generally giving eveyrone a good time. So my lead, took notice and talked to me, she told me that "its not my fault and that I shouldn’t blame myself squarely, because we were a team and each and one of us is responsible." I guess when she told me that, it gave me a sense of relief. And thanks to a friend of mine, whom I think God used to help me cheer up, thank you, I won’t mention her name, but you really gave me smile during the day. I was so annoying to you, yet you kept up hahaha. thank you, though I didn’t meet "Sam" like you promised, my eyes still hurt and feel like vomiting hahaha. But don’t worry I prayed for your intentions.

       After work, yes traffic as usual, but I just thought to myself, well "I’m now going that one place where I can just be at peace." I prayed for what seemed like an eternity, just talking to Him, thanking things could have been worse, and praying for a better tomorrow. Lord, sometimes I feel like I traverse this road, feeling lost, feeling lonely, lacking inspiration, feeling confused because I can’t please everyone, if only I could split myself up to a million pieces but I can’t, but somehow you make it all work out, in your mysterious will, I somehow find my way, and can’t help but feel inspired. Like today, I woke up feeling great, and come afternoon, my family and I just watched my niece enjoy herself in the pool, she was just having a blast, trying to wet me in the process(which she was successful at) and little moments like that, that define her time and our family memories. The weather is cooperative today too, not scorching but actually cool.  Thank you God for leading me that path, I myself can’t wait for september seattle conference, I cn’t wait to meet other people of the same interests and allow myself to share my experience and faith which is the most important thing to me. And maybe, just maybe, I find what I have been looking for….

Faithful Father

(Brian Doerksen)

Father, I can’t explain this kind of love
This kind of grace
I know I still break Your heart
And yet You run to welcome me

This is my song of praise to You
For who You are and all that You do
From the moment my life began
You have been faithful

Father, I love the way You hold me close
And say my name
I know when my life is through
My heart will find its home in You

This is my song of praise to You
For who You are and all that You do
From the moment my life began
You have been faithful
You will be faithful
Forever faithful

This is our song of praise to You
For who You are and all that You do
From before the world began
You have been faithful
You will be faithful
Forever faithful

Happy Birthday Ate Ella, Kuya Sem, Kuya Jay and Kuya Gil!! These birthdays reminds me always middle of the year already, how time fly so fast! Ang tatanda niyo na hahaha. Anyways, may you guys have many more to come. 

Can anyone dispute my claim that is quite possibly the best chocolate bar there is, and no I’m not advertising, but since time immemorial I have always thought Whatchamacalit was the best! Ever since I ate one during my childhood days, with its creamy, chewy taste(haha, josie hope you like that one)its always my first and foremost choice of choco bar Yay!! And now after the longest time of looking for this choco bar, I finally found it in our vendo machine!!!

Shifting Sand

by Caedmon’s Call

album: 40 Acres (1999)

Sometimes I believe all the liesSo I can do the things I should despiseAnd every day I am swayedBy whatever is on my mind

I hear it all depends on my faith So I'm feeling precariousThe only problem I have with these mysteries Is they're so mysterious

And like a consumer I've been thinkingIf I could just get a bit moreMore than my 15 minutes of faith,Then I'd be secure

(Chorus)My faith is like shifting sandChanged by every waveMy faith is like shifting sand So I stand on grace

I've begged you for some proof For my Thomas eyes to seeA slithering staff, a leperous handAnd lions resting lazily

A glimpse of your back-side gloryAnd this soaked altar going ablazeBut you know I've seen so muchI explained it away

Chorus

Waters rose as my doubts reignedMy sand-castle faith, it slipped awayFound myself standing on your graceIt'd been there all the time

(Chorus repeated)Stand on grace